Cat Litter Casserole Recipe
Ingredients:
1 cup of baking mix (Bisquick)
1 cup of shredded cheese (Cheddar)
1 pound of ground meat (beef, pork or turkey)
Sausage
For the Litter:
2 cups of rice (long grain)
2 Tablespoons of butter (or margarine)
2 teaspoons of salt
3-3/4 cups of water
Instructions:
Preheat oven (350 degrees F). Combine baking mix, shredded cheese, and ground meat inside a bowl; mix thoroughly by hand. Mold mixture to various shapes and sizes of dumps.
Arrange them on a baking dish(es) or pan(s), don’t let them touch. Bake for 20 mins till brown, a little crusty, and firm.
While waiting for meat to cook, combine rice, water, salt, and butter inside a saucepan above high heat; let it boil then stir. Lower down the heat into low then cover. Let it simmer, undisturbed, for 14 mins.
Take saucepan out from heat. Fluff or break the cooked rice using the fork; set on the side. When meat is done, gently transfer onto paper towel(s) to absorb excess oil. Spoon rice onto the empty and used pan or dish, leaving other dumps uncovered partially.
>> Cat Litter Casserole Recipe
Tortured Tomatoes with Bird Dropping Dressing Recipe
Ingredients:
2 pcs of tomatoes (ripe, large); rinsed and halved
2 Tbsps of crumbled cheese (Blue)
Dressing (Roquefort)
Instructions:
Place halved tomatoes inside a Ziploc bag then squeeze air out and seal. Pound them till bruised. Divide pounded tomatoes equally among 4 bowls. Sprinkle crumbled blue cheese and dribble dressing on each.
>> Tortured Tomatoes with Bird Dropping Dressing Recipe
Brains on the Half Skull Recipe
Ingredients:
2 pieces of potatoes (medium-sized)
1 package of spaghetti (angel hair, 8 oz)
14 ounces of spaghetti sauce
Instructions:
Preheat oven (400 degrees F).
Rinse potatoes then cut lengthwise into half. Arrange on baking sheet with sliced side facing up. Bake at about forty mins.
While waiting for potatoes to finish baking, prepare angel hair spaghetti as stated in the instructions for the product. Drain water from cooked pasta. When potatoes in oven are almost ready, heat up spaghetti sauce.
Take out potatoes once cooked. Scoop the potato insides; set them aside. The shells of potatoes will be the skull.
When sauce is boiling, take it out from heat; stir in cooked pasta. Put pasta inside the shells.
>> Brains on the Half Skull Recipe
Penicillin Pizza Recipe
Ingredients:
6 pieces of muffins (English)
1 jar of sauce for pizza
2 cups of shredded cheese (Mozzarella)
3 Tablespoons of grated cheese (Parmesan)
Food color (red, yellow, and green)
Instructions:
Split the muffins then place them onto a baking sheet, don’t let them touch each other. Spoon over small amount of pizza sauce and cover with shredded Mozzarella. Set on the side.
Place grated Parmesan onto a bowl. Add 5 drops of each coloring. Mix thoroughly till its color is like a slime. Set on the side.
Broil pizzas till cheese melt and slightly brown. Take out from the oven. Let it cool for a min.
Sprinkle the slimy mixture onto (hot) pizzas. Let them slightly cool. Serve.
>> Penicillin Pizza Recipe
Cheese and Carrot Corps Recipe
Ingredients:
1/4 cup of cream cheese (whipped)
1/4 cup of spreading (peanut butter)
2 Tablespoons of carrot shreds
Instructions:
Combine (peanut) butter and (cream) cheese inside a bowl; blend thoroughly. Add carrot shreds; mix thoroughly. Serve at once onto toasted bread.
>> Cheese and Carrot Corps Recipe
Kabibbles Recipe
Ingredients:
1 pack of croutons (garlic and onion)
1/2 cup of butter (melted)
1 teaspoon of paprika (sweet)
2 teaspoons of salt (celery)
2 Tablespoons of sesame seeds
Instructions:
Pour the croutons onto a bowl. Mix together butter, sesame seeds, salt, and paprika; add onto the croutons then toss them well. Transfer onto a baking sheet.
Toast inside the oven (275 degrees F) for twenty mins, while stirring at every five mins. Let it cool.
>> Kabibbles Recipe
Hairball Salad with Saliva Dressing Recipe
Ingredients:
1 piece of avocado (ripe, large)
2 cups of Alfalfa sprouts
5-6 pieces of carrots (large); rinsed, peeled, then grated
Salad dressing (Italian)
Instructions;
Cut the avocado into half then scoop its pit out. Scoop the avocado onto a bowl then add the sprouts; mash using the fork. Set on the side. Divide carrots onto 4 individual serving bowls.
Make walnut-sized “hairballs” from mixture of avocado. Arrange the balls above the carrots then pour over the dressing or “saliva”. Serve.
>> Hairball Salad with Saliva Dressing Recipe
Ants in the Sand Recipe
Ingredients:
2 pcs of crackers (Graham)
Sprinkles (chocolate)
Instructions:
Place the crackers inside a Ziploc bag then crush them. Add some sprinkles inside and seal. Give as a treat for kids.
>> Ants in the Sand Recipe
Armchair Quarterback Crunch Recipe
Ingredients:
3 quarts of popcorn (popped)
2 cups of pretzels (mini)
1/3 cup of roasted pepitas (or hulled)
Pumpkin seeds
1/4 cup of margarine (regular or light)
2 Tablespoons of grated cheese (Parmesan)
1 teaspoon of seasoning (Mexican)
Instructions:
Place the pretzels, popcorn, pepitas, and pumpkin seeds inside a bowl. Place margarine on a pan above heat and melt. Add grated cheese and seasoning; stir. Drizzle onto popcorn; toss gently.
>> Armchair Quarterback Crunch Recipe
Dead Sea Soup Recipe
Ingredients:
1 piece of celery heart (with white leafy stalks)
1 jar of artichoke hearts (small); drained
10-1/2 oz of canned (chicken w/ rice soup)
Food color (blue and green)
1 cup of crackers (fish shaped)
Instructions:
Chop (celery) heart to little pieces. Pull the stalks apart by hand so it resembles the seaweed. Place on the side. Cut the artichoke into penny sizes.
Prepare the canned soup as stated in its instructions. Add artichokes then celery; heat till soup boils. Lower down the heat into low then gently add 2 or 3 drops of each food color till it resembles like the color of seawater.
Gently ladle soup onto individual serving bowls. Sprinkle over (1/4 cup) crackers onto each bowl. Place celery or the seaweed hanging over the bowl edges. Serve at once.
>> Dead Sea Soup Recipe
Hobo Popcorn Recipe
Ingredients:
4 tsps of oil (cooking oil)
4 Tbsps of popcorn
Butter (melted)
Salt
Instructions:
Cut an 18-inch square foil in 4 squares. Place a tablespoon of popcorn and a teaspoon of oil on each center. Bring its corners to center and seal the edges. Tie onto a stick.
Cook the pouch above heating coals then shake occasionally till all are popped. Open then season salt and (melted) butter.
>> Hobo Popcorn Recipe
Worm Burgers Recipe
Ingredients:
1-1/2 cups of monggo bean sprouts; rinsed
1 pound of beef (ground)
1 piece of egg (large)
Salt & Pepper (to taste)
6 pieces of burger buns; sliced open
Catsup
Mayonnaise
Instructions:
Combine (1 cup) sprouts, egg, and beef inside the bowl; mix by hand. Season salt & pepper. Form into 6 patties.
Cook above moderate heat till browned on both sides. Place them inside the buns. Garnish sprouts or “worms”. Serve them with catsup and mayonnaise, “blood” and “pus”.
>> Worm Burgers Recipe
Diaper Dump Porridge Recipe
Ingredients:
10 ounce of canned broth (beef)
1 tube of biscuits (refrigerated)
10 oz of canned broth (chicken)
Instructions;
Pour (beef) broth inside the saucepan and set on side. Remove and separate biscuits in tube. Gently slice each into half. Sculpt by hand the pieces of biscuits to dump shapes then add onto the (beef) broth.
Place saucepan above moderate heat then cook till it boils. Reduce heat into low then cover. Simmer it for 15 to 20 mins. Check broth occasionally.
Pour (chicken) broth along with equivalent amount of water onto another saucepan. Gently transfer cooked “dumps” from (beef) broth onto the (chicken) broth saucepan. Heat saucepan of (chicken) broth as stated in its directions.
>> Diaper Dump Porridge Recipe
Pease Porridge Hot Recipe
Ingredients:
4 pieces of bacon strips
3/4 cup of chopped onions
22-1/2 ounces of condensed soup (green pea)
4 cups of water
3/4 teaspoons of salt
1-1/3 cups of Minute Rice
Instructions:
Cook bacon till scrip then place on paper towel(s) to drain excess oil. Save 2 tablespoons of its dripping then discard remaining. Saute onions with the saved drippings on a saucepan till slightly brown and soft.
Add soup then slowly pour water; mix and let it boil. Once boiling, add bacon, salt, and rice; stir thoroughly. Cover then take out from heat. Allow to stand about 5 mins then serve at once.
>> Pease Porridge Hot Recipe
Bologna and Cheesewitch Recipe
Ingredients:
3/4 of Cheese (Swiss)
1 pound of Bologna
1 Tablespoon of relish (India)
4 Tablespoons of onion; chopped
1/4 cup of mustard (prepared)
6 pieces of hotdog rolls (whole)
6 Tablespoons of butter
1/3 cup of mayonnaise
Instructions:
Place cheese and Bologna inside the processor or grinder for meat; grind them together. Combine with relish, onion, mayonnaise, and mustard; mix them well. Butter the inside on each (hotdog) roll; stuff equally with the meat mixture.
Wrap the rolls individually with foil. Place inside the refrigerator for one hour. Bake (325 degrees F) for twenty-five mins.
>> Bologna and Cheesewitch Recipe
Dirt Cups Recipe
Ingredients:
1 package of instant pudding (chocolate)
2 cups of milk
16 ounce of cookies (Oreos); crushed
3-1/2 cup of Cool Whip
Garnish:
8 pcs of gummy candies (worms)
8 pcs of flowers (plastic)
Instructions:
Pour the milk onto a bowl then add the pudding mixture; beat thoroughly till blended well for 2 mins. Let it stand for 5 mins then add whipped cream and 1/2 of the cookies.
Place a tablespoon of the cookies on the base of an 8 ounce cup then fill with the mixture of pudding till three quarters full. Cover with the rest of crumbs. Garnish as desired.
>> Dirt Cups Recipe
Spit-Wad Sandwiches Recipe
Ingredients:
2 pcs of bread slices
Peanut butter (creamy)
2 pcs of marshmallow (large)
Instructions;
Spread (peanut) butter on each bread. Pull the marshmallows apart to many small spit-wad-size pieces. Place marshmallow onto (peanut) butter. Place them together like a sandwich. Serve.
>> Spit-Wad Sandwiches Recipe
Snouts & Beans Recipe
Ingredients:
16 oz of plain beans (baked)
1 tsp of Worcestershire
1/4 cup of sugar (brown)
1 Tbsp of Teriyaki sauce
2 Tbsps of barbecue sauce
8 pcs of knockwursts (beef)
Instructions:
Place beans inside the saucepan; add sugar, Worcestershire, teriyaki and barbecue sauces. Stir them well; set on the side. Cut off knockwurst ends and slice equally into 1-inch long segments.
Place snouts inside the saucepan; cover water and cook for 5 to 10 mins. Cook beans above gentle heat, while stirring occasionally, till bubbly and thick. Gently remove snouts then drain onto paper towel(s).
Pour beans onto serving platter then place snouts with nostrils facing up. Serve.
>> Snouts & Beans Recipe
Clingons Recipe
Ingredients:
4-1/2 cups of marshmallows (mini)
1/3 cup of peanut butter (creamy)
1/4 cup of margarine
3-1/2 cups of cereal (Rice chex)
1/2 cup of chocolates (M & M’s)
Instructions:
Grease the 9×13-inch baking pan. Combine (peanut) butter, margarine, and marshmallows inside a microwave-safe bowl. Heat inside the microwave till melted and stir till smooth and add the chocolate and cereal. Stir to even out the coating.
Spread the mixture onto the pan. Gently press using the spoon. Place inside the refrigerator for an hour. Cut to squares.
>> Clingons Recipe
Puked Up Potatoes Recipe
Ingredients:
1 piece of carrot (medium); peeled and chopped to small pieces
4 pieces of potatoes (medium); peeled and cubed to an inch
3 pieces of celery (stalks); peeled and chopped to small pieces
1/2 cup of frozen beans (green)
12 ounce of jarred gravy (chicken or turkey)
1/2 cup of milk
3 Tablespoons of butter
Salt
Instructions:
Place celery, beans, and carrots inside a (small) pan then place potatoes onto a (medium) pan. Cover water on the two pans then add 1/8 teaspoon salt. Place pans above moderate heat till boiling. Reduce heat into medium-low.
Pour gravy on the mixture of carrots; cook above gentle heat till hot, while stirring occasionally. Add milk and butter onto potatoes; mash till smooth and no more lumps.
Scoop the (mashed) potatoes onto a serving plate. Pour over gravy or “puke”. Serve at once.
>> Puked Up Potatoes Recipe
Boogers On A Stick Recipe
Ingredients:
8 ounce of cheese spread (Cheez Whiz)
food color (green)
25 pieces of pretzel sticks
Instructions:
Melt cheese spread inside a microwave then let it cool for a while. Add food color (about 3 drops) onto warm spread and stir thoroughly.
Dip the tips of pretzel sticks onto cheese spread. Dip them repeatedly until lumps are thick or booger-like. Place on parchment paper then let it cool for 10 minutes, allowing them to firm or harden.
Gently peel off from parchment paper; arrange them on serving plates and serve.
>> Boogers On A Stick Recipe
Chopped Off Fingers Pizza Recipe
Ingredients:
1 pc of bell pepper (red, 4 oz); cored, stemmed, and seeded
12 pcs of mozzarella sticks (each 1 oz)
8 pcs of small crusts (baked, 5inch diameter)
1 c of pizza sauce
Instructions:
Cut the bell pepper into an inch wide strips then cut crosswise to half inch pieces, like fingernails. Round the corners to resemble the nails.
Slice crosswise each mozzarella stick into half. Cut a half inch square on the round end to fit the pepper or nail.
Arrange the crusts on three cooking sheets then spread (pizza) sauce over the crusts. Place three cheese or fingers per crust. Place the pepper or nail on each stick or finger. Bake at 450 degrees F for 8 mins till cheese starts melting.
>> Chopped Off Fingers Pizza Recipe
Butchered Snake Bits With Barbecue Sauce Recipe
Ingredients:
10 ounces of pasta (rigatoni)
2 cans of squirtable spread (cheese)
1 jar of bbq sauce (small)
16 pieces of whole peppercorns (black)
1 piece of carrot (fresh); rinsed and peeled
Instructions:
Cook rigatoni pasta as stated in the package instructions. Drain and rinse in (cold) water.
Gently fill spread onto each pasta. Place 6 to 8 cheese-filled pasta onto a platter, forming the shape of snake. Line the (barbecue) sauce on top the snake, making the markings. Use the peppercorns for the eyes.
Make a peeling of carrot and cut into the snake’s tongue. Place tongue onto the snakes.
>> Butchered Snake Bits With Barbecue Sauce Recipe
Monster Munch Recipe
Ingredients:
1 cup of apricots (dried); chopped
3 cups of rice cereals (puffed)
1 cup of dry-roasted peanuts (unsalted)
1 pound of marshmallows (large)
1/3 cup of margarine
1/2 cup of peanut butter
1 cup of raisins
Instructions:
Combine apricots, cereal, peanuts, and raisins inside a bowl. Melt the marshmallows and margarine inside the microwave for 2 mins. Stir then add the (peanut) butter and cook for another 2 mins.
Stir till blended well. Add the cereals onto the melted mixture; toss till coated well. Quickly form to balls.
>> Monster Munch Recipe
Brain Cell Salad Recipe
Ingredients:
6 oz of Jell-O (blueberry)
16 oz of Cottage Cheese
16-1/2 oz of blueberries (canned, in syrup); drained and save the juice
or
3/4 c of blueberries (frozen); thawed
Food coloring (blue)
Instructions:
Prepare the Jell-O as stated in the package instructions. Refrigerate for 4 to 5 hours till firm. Place the cheese onto the bowl. Add blueberries then mix thoroughly. Add 3 drops food color and blend thoroughly.
Place gelatin onto each plate and top it with the cheese mixture.
>> Brain Cell Salad Recipe
Puppy Chow Recipe
Ingredients:
1/2 cup of peanut butter (creamy)
1/2 cup of butter (or margarine)
6 ounces of chocolate morsels
10 cups of cereal (Corn Chex)
2 cups of confectioner’s sugar
Instructions:
Combine butter, chocolate morsels, and (peanut) butter inside the saucepan above moderate; stir till melted and smooth. Pour onto cereals and coat evenly. Place two cups of confectioner inside a (paper) bag then place inside the coated cereal; gently shake till coated evenly. Pour onto parchment paper and let cool.
>> Puppy Chow Recipe
Nose Blow Burritos Recipe
Ingredients:
2 pieces of tomatoes (medium); diced
1 pound of beef (ground)
1 pack of taco seasoning (or burrito)
30 oz of canned beans (refried)
8-10 pieces of burrito-size soft tortillas (flour)
16 oz of guacamole
16 oz of sour cream
Instructions:
Place diced tomatoes inside the bowl. Saute the beef with seasoning till browned. Set on the side, covered.
Cook beans inside the saucepan above gentle heat, while stirring from time to time. Once they are heated through, slowly combine with browned beef inside the bowl.
Set a tortilla onto a plate then spoon guacamole or the “mucus” on its center and top with (sour) cream. Place mixed meat and vegetables inside the tortilla. Fold right and left sides tightly and tuck its lower part, forming the shape of the nose.
Cut 2 big holes as its nostrils and squeeze gently.
>> Nose Blow Burritos Recipe
Toadstools Recipe
Ingredients:
1 pc of cracker (Saltine)
1 pc of small chocolate bar (Hershey’s)
1 tsp of peanut butter (creamy)
1/2 pc of marshmallow (large)
Instructions;
Spread the (peanut) butter onto the cracker. Place a piece of chocolate on top and marshmallow. Cook inside the microwave for 20 secs. Serve at once.
>> Toadstools Recipe
Homemade Maggot Stew Recipe
Ingredients:
2 Tbsps of oil (vegetable oil)
1/4 c of flour; sifted
1/2 tsp of pepper (black)
1/2 tsp of salt
1/4 tsp of garlic powder
1 lb of beef (stew); cut into 1-inch chunks
29 oz of canned tomatoes (plain stewed)
10-1/2 oz of canned broth (beef)
1 pc of bay leaf
1 tsp of thyme
3-4 pcs of carrots (medium); peeled and slice to rounds
1 c of beans (green, frozen or fresh)
3/4 c of pasta (Orzo)
Instructions:
Heat oil inside a stew pan above medium-low. Combine flour, (garlic) powder, salt and pepper inside a plastic bag then add beef and seal. Shake till coated well and pour its contents onto stew pan. Increase heat into medium.
Brown meat till crusty. Place in the thyme, bay leaf, tomatoes, and broth; let it boil and reduce heat into low. Simmer for an hour then add beans and carrots. Simmer for 45 more mins.
Cook orzo as stated in its package instructions till tender. Use the colander to drain. Add these “maggots” onto the pan and take out from heat. Blend carefully.
>> Homemade Maggot Stew Recipe
Flat Cat Cookies Recipe
Ingredients:
20 oz of sugar dough (cookie); refrigerated
1-2 Tbsps of flour
Red candies (cinnamon)
Strawberry jelly or jam (seedless)
Instructions:
Preheat the oven as stated on its package instructions. Sprinkle the flour onto a flat and clean surface; roll the dough out into a little thick than its package stated for. Cut cookies into (flattened) cat shapes and gently transfer the shaped cookies onto cooking sheet(s).
Bake as stated on its package instructions. Prepare the candies for the nose and eyes. Gently flatten using the spoon. Set on side.
Let cooked cookies cool on their sheet(s) for 3 mins and press the candies for the nose and eyes. Transfer them onto the rack and continue to cool. Dribble the jam everywhere like the blood.
>> Flat Cat Cookies Recipe
Ralph’s Retch Recipe
Ingredients:
3 ounces of Jell-O (strawberry)
40 pieces of ice cubes
24 oz of soda in can (strawberry)
Instructions:
Prepare the Jell-O as stated in its package instructions. Pour onto a shallow dish then chill till firm or for 3 hrs. When firm, make cuts forming small cubes. Place the ice inside the blender; grind them.
Spoon pieces of gelatin and (crushed) ice to layers alternately inside tall stem glasses. Leave 2 inches of head space. Gently add soda till glass is full. Gently stir and serve.
>> Ralph’s Retch Recipe
Chuckie’s Upchuck Recipe
Ingredients:
2 tsps of margarine (or butter)
16 oz of cream-style corn
2 pcs of onions (medium); chopped
20 oz of canned soup (cream of mushroom)
2 c of milk
Any vegetable
Instructions:
Saute the onions with butter till translucent. Add cream-style corn, cream of mushroom, milk, and any preferred vegetable. Let it boil then simmer for 5 mins. Serve at once.
>> Chuckie’s Upchuck Recipe
Bugs on a Log Recipe
Ingredients:
Celery (stalks)
Spread (peanut butter, cream cheese, or cheez whiz)
Chocolate morsels
Instructions:
On a celery stalk, fill the spread onto the center and place some morsels above. Serve at once.
>> Bugs on a Log Recipe
Roasted Soybeans Recipe
Ingredients:
Celery (stalks and leaves)
Soybeans
Onions; chopped
Salt
Instructions:
Soak the beans for over a night. Combine softened beans, celery, and onions inside the kettle; season with salt. Cook above gentle heat, covered, for 3 to 4 hrs. Drain.
Spread onto a baking sheet, w/ a tablespoon or two of oil. Place inside the oven and roast at 200 degrees F for 4 to 8 hrs.
>> Roasted Soybeans Recipe
Chicken Pox Pancakes Recipe
Ingredients:
Strawberries (fresh)
Bananas (ripe)
Pancake (mix)
Confectioner’s sugar
Instructions:
Chop strawberries into (small) chunks, allow 1 or 2 for each pancake. Set on the side. Prepare pancakes as stated in the package instructions. When done, stack onto serving plates.
For each stack of 2 pancakes, peel a banana. Cut the ends then place on for the nose and the other end, cut thinly for the eyes. Cut the banana into half to be the mouth.
Place the chunks of strawberries around the face. Place confectioner around the chunks.
>> Chicken Pox Pancakes Recipe
Eyeballs on Ritz Recipe
Ingredients:
Eggs (hard boiled)
Olives (black)
Crackers (Ritz)
Food color (red)
Instructions:
Half the eggs lengthwise and scoop out the yolks. Make the filling (for the deviled egg). Cut a little hole on center bottom onto each of egg.
Poke an olive through the hole then fill the filling onto the eggs. Place egg onto the cracker with olive facing up. Paint some red veins or lines on eye.
>> Eyeballs on Ritz Recipe
Mock Chopped Liver Recipe
Ingredients:
1-1/2 Tablespoons of oil
1-1/2 cups of onions; chopped
1 cup of cashews (toasted)
1 Tablespoons of juice (lemon)
1 cup of beans (string); steamed and cut to 1-inch lengths
Salt and Pepper
Instructions:
Heat the oil on a skillet above medium-low heat. Saute the onion while stirring occasionally till golden. Combine sauteed onion, cashews, beans, and lemon juice inside the processor. Season with salt and pepper; process till smooth.
Transfer inside an airtight jar or container. Store till needed.
>> Mock Chopped Liver Recipe
Kid’s Krunchy Krazy Korn Recipe
Ingredients:
8 cups of popcorn curls (puffed)
1 cup of sugar (brown)
1/2 cup of butter (unsalted)
1/4 cup of corn syrup (light)
1/2 teaspoon of soda (Arm & Hammer)
1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
Instructions:
Heat the oven (250 degrees F). Place the puffed popcorn on a 15×10x1 inch (baking) pan. Combine sugar, syrup, and mayonnaise inside a saucepan; let it boil above moderate heat, while constantly stirring.
Let it simmer for 2 minutes. Take out from the heat then add vanilla and soda; stir thoroughly. Pour evenly onto the puffed popcorn; mix thoroughly.
Bake inside preheated oven for half an hour, stir twice while baking. Take out immediately from the pan and cool it completely onto parchment paper. Store inside airtight container.
>> Kid’s Krunchy Krazy Korn Recipe